Ashley Joanna Williams (
deadbydawn) wrote2020-08-07 09:00 pm
Entry tags:
ryslig inbox
WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, ASH WILLIAMS. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 05.22.09.12 *** ASH WILLIAMS has joined 05.22.09.12 <boomstick69> you've reached the private inbox of the king himself, ashley j. williams ;) <boomstick69> state your name and business and i'll see if i decide to get back to you | ||||

no subject
[Unlike you he is royalty, Ash. And cleans his own apartment. He gathers the materials while Ash makes the cleaning effort, and they're soon both stood over the clean tub. Reverie rubs at his chin.]
You know.... Keeping it purely alcohol based might be a great idea. Alcohol doesn't go off, right?
no subject
[Ash squints at the newly cleaned bathtub, inspecting his slightly shinier gauntlet as he does so. It occurs to him that he does need to clean this at some point--the metal keeps getting tarnished with time, and if the springs get too tarnished, they might end up getting weakened and snap.
Not that it matters, really. The arm moves regardless of whether or not it's hooked up properly, thanks to magic. He shakes his head, focusing on the assortment of bottles laid before him.]
I recently snatched a bottle of cherry-flavored rum--maybe we can start with that as a base, see where we wanna go from there. Maybe it real festive, y'know?
cw drugs
Cherry based would be perfect. Like that fancy cherry shit they put in cakes here. [He means kirsch.] Perhaps... Oh, I do have some edible glitter, actually. That's festive.
[Although it's too baggies he pulls out of his pocket.]
I also have some cocaine.
no subject
Hey--I just got an idea. Y'know how, like, old-school Coca-Cola used to have cocaine in it? Same with cough syrup and shit, that kinda thing. [Rev surely doesn't, but Ash doesn't care.] What if we pitched this as a sorta...pick me up? For partyin' and daily use. That way, we can sell even more and make even more.
[A pause.]
For medicinal purposes, of course.
no subject
[He pops the bag with a talon, pouring it into the bath so they can get it mixed through.]
That's brilliant. You're a genius. We'll of course have to have all the disclaimers on the bottle. Can't have some fool blaming us for not being able to handle their cocaine.
no subject
[Why didn't he think about this before? Probably 'cus trying to purposely sell Pink Fuck back in Michigan would've gotten him in more legal trouble than he would've been bothered to deal with, and also because when you put a price tag on party jungle juice, less people come to said parties.
Ash leans over the bathtub, tapping a finger against his chin in thought. He kneels down, picking up a bottle of grenadine, a jug of what looks to be agave nectar, and a small container of ground cinnamon. He proceeds to pours it all into the receptacle.
A sickly sweet, alcoholic smell fills the air.]
That should give it an extra kick. You gonna taste it, or what?
no subject
Reverie extends a hand to Ash.]
You think you're getting out of trying it that easy? Come on.
no subject
Alright. Don't freak out too bad, alright? Last time I tried this on a human chick, she nearly had a panic attack and I had to bail early.
[To be fair, she was the one who had agreed to it, but soon realized it wasn't for her. Ash reaches out with his left hand and grabs Rev's wrist, his form blurring further into static and scan lines until he's nothing more than a fuzzy, man-shaped blob. Rev might feel his arms and legs prickle with a sensation that borders on painful, as if his limbs are falling asleep.
Ash's form completely disappears. Reverie will feel his limbs lock up, his physical body now out of his control. The tingling dissipates as Rev's limbs seem to move on their own, with Ash inspecting the man's claws and kicking his legs to test them.]
Jesus, didn't think five inches would've made that much of a difference. How do you not get dizzy from up here?
[It might be a little jarring to hear Rev's voice in Ash's cadence.]
no subject
'M only 6'6". Not that tall.
[There's another flutter of panic when Ash moves his hands.]
Get on w'it.
no subject
There's a brief pause as he considers the contents of his glass. A lopsided, almost manic grin stretches across his face.]
Bottoms up, bitch!
[He takes a large swig. Immediately, there's the taste of the cherry rum, followed by the burning sensation of the alcohol and cinnamon at the back of his throat. It's tooth-achingly sweet, enough to make Ash almost gag. Almost--but he's stomached worse in his time.]
Jesus Christ--
[The aftertaste is horrible, an awful bitterness that leaves his tongue parched. His instinct is to immediately take another swig of the drink to wash it out. After a few moments, he says, very quietly--]
I think we need more cocaine.
no subject
...Inner pocket, there's another bag. It might be MDMA. Not sure.
[He goes to reach himself, before remembering Ash is the one in control here.]
Worth a try.
no subject
A lightbulb goes off in his head. He pulls open the baggie, takes out one of the pills, and places it on his tongue. With one fell swoop, he fills the glass with more of this awful concoction and gulps the entire thing down, like one might take any other sort of pill.
His throat burns. With a cough, he places the empty glass on the edge of the tub.]
There we go. Hold up--
[He loosens his control on Rev's body, shaking himself free and quite literally falling out of the vampire. He stumbles forward, intersecting with the tub before he's able to straighten up again.]
Now we wait and see what this thing has in store for us. Would ya believe me if I said that I've never, like, eaten cocaine?
[Nor has he snorted it at any point in time, but that's beside the point.]
cw drugs but i have to swipe out half the shit it does bc he's dead
Ash slipping out at last makes the slow dread abate, at least. The last thing any product testing needs is a bad trip, brought on by whatever it is about not being control that freaks him out.
Any future bad dreams of searing light in a broken tower are purely coincidental.]
Never even rubbed it on your gums?
no subject
What? 'Course I have. Just wanted to make sure I got the full dosage, if you know what I mean.
[That's a no.]
So, what's your opinion on the drink? I gotta know, since we're servin' this to the population, and surveying'll make us sound more credible.
[Sample size of two.]
no subject
It's like... Made of the same skin as inside your nostrils. Anywhere your skin is like... Thin or produces moisture would probably work.
[Make of that what you will.]
It's.... The taste is rough. Might be best to say it's like... A tonic so people can't bitch it tastes strong.
no subject
Tonic. Yeah. That'll work. Man, this marketing shit is easy. I shoulda gone into marketing instead of engineering--then at least I'd be usin' my degree.
[He screws up his face in thought.]
...needs a snappy name. Like Pink Fuck--tells you exactly what you're gettin' into, right? It's pink, and it'll get you fucked up. Red something. Red...Fuck...no, that's infringing on Pink Fuck territory. Red....
[He snaps his fingers, searching for the right word. After a few moments, his eyes light up.]
Red Alert?
no subject
It's bullshit.]
Red Alert! Perfect!
[He pauses. Then frowns.]
We should test it on one of the like. Big guys. For science.
no subject
Agreed.
[He begins lowering himself to the ground, trying to slow his own movements. In the end, he just looks like he's intentionally moving slowly.]
After...um....after I sit here for a second.
[He's like, clipping through the ground so that his waist is halfway through the floorboards.]